God (@TweetOfGod) has been on twitter since October 2010 and ever since he’s been bestowing us with his bitter-sweet wrath bundled in less than 280 characters. From talking about the climate crisis to despising Trump, ‘God’ has been making a fun of his ‘creation’ as in, us humans who, without any doubt, have been failing him splendidly time after time.
With 6 million followers, God’s profile is still unverified and its creator David Javerbaum, who runs it, deems it a satire that mainly aims the American politics, climate change and taunts directed at humanity.
The following tweets by god are a few of his words, among the whopping 10.7K tweets he’s posted so far. We didn’t get to scour all of them,but here are the recent ones that are sure to incite a laugh or two.
IN TRUMP’S ROLODEX
* Prince of Whales
* Dolly Llama
* Prime Minister True Dough
* Emmanuel Macaroni
* Angela Marble
* Benjamin Not-on-Yahoo
* King Salmon
* The Poop— God (@TheTweetOfGod) June 13, 2019
White, black, brown, yellow, man, woman, transgender, gay, straight, Christian, Muslim, young, old, ALL of you will taste the same to the zombies.
— God (@TheTweetOfGod) June 4, 2019
There is no past.
There is no future.
There is only this moment.
And now it’s gone.
Nice. Nice job.— God (@TheTweetOfGod) May 21, 2019
Nah. If you know My track record I’m actually more pro-death. https://t.co/jevGX9irz3
— God (@TheTweetOfGod) May 15, 2019
If you think #GameofThrones is ending poorly, wait till you see how you finish off.
— God (@TheTweetOfGod) May 13, 2019
This #EarthDay give the planet what it really wants: the spontaneous disappearance of 99% of you.
— God (@TheTweetOfGod) April 22, 2019
The human race is at 2% on Rotten Tomatoes.
— God (@TheTweetOfGod) November 20, 2019
Twitter can’t verify Me because you can’t either.
— God (@TheTweetOfGod) November 9, 2019
I’m hearing a lot of feedback from dead animals that plastic is less delicious than it looks.
— God (@TheTweetOfGod) May 2, 2019
The people who call out My name Sunday morning aren’t as fun the ones who call it out Saturday night.
— God (@TheTweetOfGod) November 3, 2019
Time is money.
Money talks.
So time talks.
But talk is cheap.
So time is cheap.
But time is money.
So money is cheap.
Which it’s not.— God (@TheTweetOfGod) October 28, 2019
The President of the United States is insane.
— God (@TheTweetOfGod) October 17, 2019
Gettin’ closer! https://t.co/tWy1T1My2W
— God (@TheTweetOfGod) September 9, 2019
THE FIVE STAGES OF CLIMATE CHANGE
1. Denial
2. Guilt
3. Depression
4. Acceptance
5. Drowning— God (@TheTweetOfGod) August 19, 2019
“The way to prevent more poisonings is to give everyone poison.” – The National Poison Association.
— God (@TheTweetOfGod) August 4, 2019
The bad news: climate change threatens 1 in every 4 species with extinction.
The good news: you’re one of them.
— God (@TheTweetOfGod) July 28, 2019
If you follow Me, could you please retweet this? I’m trying to call Twitter’s attention to My broken follower count without resorting to striking their headquarters with lightning.
Which I still may do anyway.
— God (@TheTweetOfGod) July 19, 2019
What doesn’t kill you needs to try harder.
— God (@TheTweetOfGod) July 8, 2019
Here are 50 stars, 13 stripes, seven mammals and zero living souls. pic.twitter.com/pLvmTFH3gM
— God (@TheTweetOfGod) August 27, 2018
Be the change you wish to see in the world.
Make yourself 2.5°C colder.
— God (@TheTweetOfGod) June 29, 2019
Alexa, end it all.
— God (@TheTweetOfGod) June 20, 2019
To check out more tweets take a look at @TweetOfGod. Thank us later.
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